Monday, May 30, 2011

its getting late and i don't mind.

Two guys and Two girls.. sounds like a porn. Would make my life much more simplier.
You are one of the nicest, and best guys I have met. You're smart, kind, caring, loving, asks to hang out, plans things, texts me first, good looking, and have some funny moments. Someone I can acutally see myself with, yet i can't, and do not want this to go anywhere, but where it is. I really should explain that to you.
You, I am completly in love with you. When I'm around you and I fall in love with you everytime. You know just how to kiss me. you know how to make me laugh, and when you hold me I could be no where else in the world. I can see a far distance future with you. But you are not the person i should be with either. From what I have come to realize you need to grow up, stop smoking weed everyday, and you need to go somewhere with your life. But yet I can't stop myself from falling in love with you, and wanting to be with you.
You, I'm definitly attracted to you, which is a problem. I get slight jealously feelings from you, which is also a problem. You are a problem madame. But I feel as though I'm handling you pretty well.
You, I'm acutally really happy for you. you weren't happy then, and I see that now. Thank you for teaching me so much stuff about everything. I very much hope that we remain friends.
Grad was great, it still hasn't sunk in yet.. i do not know what I'm waiting for...
I do not know how to react, i do not know what to say, how to act. But I do not want what you are suggesting. But i do understand, and I will do anything for you in this time. You have done so much for me, its the least i can do for you. Maybe change is a good thing.
I feel as though i have a lot on my shoulders at the moment, and being tired from dry grad isn't helping. I do not like stress.
You're beautiful, and i wish that you will find someone that tickles you're fancy that you also tickle their fancy, and i hope this person is wonderful, and treats you like an angel, because you deserve no less, and i love you ever so dearly.

Thursday, May 5, 2011

these worries are so heavy

If this was anyone else, I'd be gone so fast. I love you so much, but I fear you won't come through on what you say. I feel like I'm your number 2, Like once you get sick of her you'll move back to me. I hate thinking like that, and you said that wasn't the reason. But its just how I feel. I hate waiting, and I still hate this. Honestly i do not know what to do, its not like I can walk away, cause I have nothing to walk away from. This is stupid, how can you say you love me so much, yet you need to finish with her.