It's night like tonight where I can't sleep that I realize how much I truly do love you and all your flaws. In your forgiving arms I feel as though my life is figured out and that no matter where I go in life I will always be welcome into your arms. I feel horrible for having hurt you so badly but I have never regretted what I did. And I know you feel how much this has changed. I am nervous for our futures but why fret on that now, I am going to love you that I know for sure.

I am in this rut that involves being anti social besides being with Trevor. But being with him is so easy which is why I am always with him. All I do is work sleep study and read. Mostly read. I do not know if I should try and break out of this rut, I am not going to lie I am content. I am also so tired all the time.

With being in this rut I have been neglectful of my friendship duties... And I feel horrible about that. And I am here to talk whenever you need me.

No matter what happens I am going to be your side. You can move to the other side of Canada and I will go with you. You sacrificed so much for me and I want you to be happy. And if this isn't then I'll make sure you don't spend nights alone. You are my best friend after all and it's only right that now that I am old enough we take turns taking care of each other. I got your back.